Left Hand Path Altar Space
While we all here are on the Left Hand Path, we each are in our own lane. Close in our direction but individuals who each have our own special connection with Lilith. You are never alone. As you seek to become more of the real you, Lilith guides you and supports you by sending souls to become your chosen family. These may be lovers or a source of guidance. They all are in your life for the purpose of your path. It is continual learning to enjoy the things in life we were created to enjoy."--XP
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Grand Initiation Diary
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Lost again
Broken and weary Unable to find my way Tail in hand Dizzy and clearly unable to Just let this go I am surrendering to the gravity and the unknown Catch me, heal me, lift me back up to the sun I choose to live I fell again Like a baby unable to stand on my own Tail in hand Dizzy and clearly unable to just let this go High and surrendering to the gravity and the unknown Catch me, heal me, lift me back up to the sun I choose to live, I choose to live, I choose to live Catch me, heal me, lift me back up to the sun Help me survive the bottom Calm these hands before they Snare another pill and Drive another nail down another needy hole Please release me I am surrendering to the gravity and the unknown Catch me, heal me, lift me back up to the sun I choose to live, I choose to live |
A More Simple Black Baptism {link)
Demonic
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(1) I have been working on shamanic trance states, going deeper and deeper for some time now, (2) I have been doing some altar magick daily for some time now, hoping for this kind of connection, and (3) I am 60 years old--not only a time of life when rewards of life battles start showing up but at the end of my second Saturn Return in Week 4 of a Self-led Grand Initiation to the left Hand Path. (4) On top of all of those influences, a spiritual Pocahontas and her Nexion have increased the frequency and brought my experiences a level up.
I see Lucifer cast down on the edge of darkness, arms stretched behind where his wings once out-folded, starring down into his own inner illumination, the God within that he will become after this stage of Apostasy turns through Transmutation to Apotheosis.
However, it is myself, fallen from the Oversoul, disillusioned with mainstream religion and even rigid groups that claim they know a One True Way. I see I have not fallen from the true Oversoul, the Void Serpent, writhing like a rainbow ouroboros of all ages, creeds, guises: this Darkness, known as Satan, Set, Baphomet, Babalon, Leviathan. I have fallen from a construct of a Hierophant, losing wings that only flew around the thin rim of the Wheel of Fortune.
Now I am transfixed by the Illumination within the depth of my own Soul and Self. The power to become a god in human form radiates with vibrations that explode in waves of sensuality from this bright hub, along the spokes in electrical excitement to the rims of turning constructs beneath the radiant darkness. I know that if I dive deep, I will be filled with power, emanating in wings not of feathers now but of fire. Here in the darkness is the eternal flame to which I must ever return or become battle worn, turning to stone like the other constructs.
I remember that Crowley wrote of the emerald serpent that circles the Wheel and the scarlet heart within. Along the rim are the Lamb with flag, the Wolf, and the Raven. The Wolf of flesh and the Raven of mind distract from the center, but the Lamb deceives even the elect (true chosen ones) with a simulation of spirit. Crowley also writes that the child that seems to be dancing in this radiant center appears as Bacchus, Krishna, Adonis, Shiva... but is actually complete stillness and silence, perhaps the Lord of Silence, the still-small voice.
I am transfixed.
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I noted a green light shining through the trees next to a flashing yellow light on an early lap. Then the wind blew the fence gate closed with a slam as I approached. I paused in the midst of an object lesson, praying that I was willing to stop walking and yet also willing to go on. With no certain prompting, I opened the gate and walked on, reflecting that both the lights and the closing gate carried a message of proceeding with caution, going on but with care.
Devotees should "show up every day"; offer sound, voice, fire, alcohol, service, and study--time, attention, and skill set to deity. There is the warning to remember free will, autonomy, personal gnosis, and boundaries. Pagan priests say to negotiate a clear contract--so I have asked to keep my family, faith, and path acquired so far as well as for my age and stage of life to be considered in any demands. Later, I realized I should account for the changeableness of human nature, and not make a lifetime commitment.
Taking care to express boundaries--my "ouroboros contract"--as a human that can change in time and that has previous commitments, I still cried out to be taught, trained, and initiated.
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The Left Hand Path called me to greater focus on Self and Freedom. The paradox is my pleasure in willing submission and willing suspension.
I see Lucifer cast down on the edge of darkness, arms stretched behind where his wings once out-folded, starring down into his own inner illumination, the God within that he will become after this stage of Apostasy turns through Transmutation to Apotheosis.
However, it is myself, fallen from the Oversoul, disillusioned with mainstream religion and even rigid groups that claim they know a One True Way. I see I have not fallen from the true Oversoul, the Void Serpent, writhing like a rainbow ouroboros of all ages, creeds, guises: this Darkness, known as Satan, Set, Baphomet, Babalon, Leviathan. I have fallen from a construct of a Hierophant, losing wings that only flew around the thin rim of the Wheel of Fortune.
Now I am transfixed by the Illumination within the depth of my own Soul and Self. The power to become a god in human form radiates with vibrations that explode in waves of sensuality from this bright hub, along the spokes in electrical excitement to the rims of turning constructs beneath the radiant darkness. I know that if I dive deep, I will be filled with power, emanating in wings not of feathers now but of fire. Here in the darkness is the eternal flame to which I must ever return or become battle worn, turning to stone like the other constructs.
I remember that Crowley wrote of the emerald serpent that circles the Wheel and the scarlet heart within. Along the rim are the Lamb with flag, the Wolf, and the Raven. The Wolf of flesh and the Raven of mind distract from the center, but the Lamb deceives even the elect (true chosen ones) with a simulation of spirit. Crowley also writes that the child that seems to be dancing in this radiant center appears as Bacchus, Krishna, Adonis, Shiva... but is actually complete stillness and silence, perhaps the Lord of Silence, the still-small voice.
I am transfixed.
-------
I noted a green light shining through the trees next to a flashing yellow light on an early lap. Then the wind blew the fence gate closed with a slam as I approached. I paused in the midst of an object lesson, praying that I was willing to stop walking and yet also willing to go on. With no certain prompting, I opened the gate and walked on, reflecting that both the lights and the closing gate carried a message of proceeding with caution, going on but with care.
Devotees should "show up every day"; offer sound, voice, fire, alcohol, service, and study--time, attention, and skill set to deity. There is the warning to remember free will, autonomy, personal gnosis, and boundaries. Pagan priests say to negotiate a clear contract--so I have asked to keep my family, faith, and path acquired so far as well as for my age and stage of life to be considered in any demands. Later, I realized I should account for the changeableness of human nature, and not make a lifetime commitment.
Taking care to express boundaries--my "ouroboros contract"--as a human that can change in time and that has previous commitments, I still cried out to be taught, trained, and initiated.
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The Left Hand Path called me to greater focus on Self and Freedom. The paradox is my pleasure in willing submission and willing suspension.
Baphomet, Star of Babalon,
and Original Goat Pentegram
O mighty Lord Satan,
God of this world, God of my flesh, God of my mind, God of my innermost Will! Every part of this world is within Your power. You are within every part of this world. Every part of me is within Your power. You are within every part of me. I am yours, whether I serve you willingly or not, for I am myself, whether I am true to myself or not. Of my own free will, I now acknowledge Your power. Of my own free will, I now present myself to You. |
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